It never seems easy to be content, much less joyous, while attempting to hurdle through current obstacles . Grace has progressed so much through the years. However, autism continues to dictate how we conduct our daily lives. Adolescence has brought forth a whole new set of challenges that we continuously work to overcome. I have spent the summer, day after day, hour upon hour, living ABA therapy.
It all can be overwhelming at times. It can be depressing and dark. You grow weary. It it isn’t always one big thing. Dishes, laundry, therapy, appointments and bills. Yes, sometimes it’s all the little things that start to get to you. Moments like this I call my dark nights of the soul.
I have learned, dark nights of the soul are not moments sent to overwhelm us, but opportunities for us to grow closer to God. So I pray:
“O. Lord, I am weary. I am feeling tired of autism and all that seems to entail. I find myself longing for the ordinary. An ordinary life with an ordinary family. Normal.” “My child, you are more than ordinary. You are extraordinary. Yes, extraordinary!”
I am living an extraordinary life.a life where the mundane is miraculous. It is pretty There hasn’t been room in my life to take the simple things for granted. The spoken word. Being able to jump or kick a ball. Even a simple developmental milestone such as potty training or talking. So what if it took us 7 years to get there. It happened! Each milestone achieved has been a miracle to behold.
This is why, during moments such as this, it is better for me to look back at how far we’ve come and not stress over how far we still need to go. It may take us a while, but I do believe we will eventually get there.